The GOLDEN Rule of College Partying: Know Your Neighbors
“KNOW YOUR NEIGHBORS, AND LET THEM KNOW
YOU”
The same way that professors rarely fail students whose names they know, your neighbors will rarely feel inclined to call the police and complain about your noise if they too know your name. Establishing good relationships with your neighbors is the golden rule to follow when trying to avoid getting busted.
If your neighbors are twenty somethings like you, just let them know in advance when you plan on having parties and chances are they will come, drink and you will all be friends. However, if your neighbors are all 40+ years old you have to talk to them. Let them feel involved in your life. Start with cheerful greetings when you see them on the street, and introduce yourself as their neighbor. They WILL be taken aback by how forthright you are and how unexpected it is from a 20 year old. Chat with them, and offer them your services should they ever need them.
Good, now you are established. Before you ever throw a college party, in fact, a week or two in advance, ASK them if it is ok with them. Do not…I repeat, do not “TELL” them that you are having a party. In their mind, it is their neighborhood, not yours. They do not like to be “TOLD” what’s what by the likes of you.
Use this phrase:
“I wanted to ask if it would be alright if I hosted an event for my friend’s birthday?” (Always specify the purpose. Birthdays, Holidays, Graduations etc. are qualifiers that make your neighbors understand the party as something you feel is an ethical obligation.)
Never use this phrase:
“Uhh, I like just wanted to like let you know…that, uhh, me and my friends are going to be throwing a party tomorrow because it’s like my friend Kylie’s 21st birthday, and she like wants to get super wasted.”
NEVER, EVER, EVER say the words 21st birthday. Period.
If you are courteous and well liked, chances are they will say yes even if they are actually reluctant. Offer your phone number and guarantee that if it is too loud, you will turn the party out and you should be golden. Also, remember that first impressions are everything. Therefore, maybe keep your first party toned down to give the impression that your parties are not that wild and crazy.
Lastly, always clean up outside your house ASAP after a party. It would probably be good to scour your block for trash left in the street by your guests. Your neighbors will see your effort and deem you “Considerate,” and “Clean.” And that is all you need because remember, after all,”Cleanliness is next to Godliness.” At least according to the sanctimonious type of folk that might call the cops on you for a little get together.
CREDENTIALS:
What are my credentials? I am the far from amateur host of an innumerable amount of parties (this means minimum 100+ guests) in a city known as Charleston, South Carolina, where I live a block north of Broad Street. For those unfamiliar with my fair city, the location of my house happens to be where all of the hyper-sensitive, self-entitled, hoitey-toitey, old-money families live. These people, by way of DNA, are prescribed to HATE twenty somethings and our disgusting, un-christian, boozy parties. Now, in light of all that I will say this twice: I have never been busted. I have never been busted.
If All Else Fails?
If all your planning fails and your neighbors do end up calling the cops, read our guide on what to do if the police come a knockin.
Category: College Party Bust Proofing, Featured







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