When you’re dating someone it may feel like you two are the only people in the world. Well, you’re not. As nice as that would be, there are other people in the equation that you have to get along with for better or for worse. Hopefully you get put in a great situation, one where you love your boyfriend’s friends and they love you back.
If you’ve hit relationship jackpot with this, then good for you, you’re a lucky girl. If you’re part of the other 95% then you’re bound to run into an issue where one of his friends doesn’t like you. Not everyone will like you in the world and more specifically, not all of your boyfriend’s friends are going to like you. So, what do you do about it?
Scenario One: The Trash Talker
So your boyfriend’s friend talks bad about you. He fills your guy’s ear with how many parties he’s missing because of you, and regales him with stories about the slutty cheerleader who licked whipped cream off his chest one night. He tries to make you seem boring, annoying, and as though you’re personally responsible for making his life worse. You’re not. Not only is he bad to you, but also he starts to take it out on his friend, your boyfriend! He starts not inviting him places and ignoring him. Then when your guy sends him a message and asks why he’s acting that way, the friend naturally blames it on you and says, “I didn’t think she’d let you.” This guy tries to sabotage your relationship by always making you seem like the fun sucking bad girlfriend.
How to Fix It:
Chances are this guy is just an asshole, but maybe it’s something else. Maybe he just misses his friend and blames that on you for taking him away from him.
Confronting his friend won’t do anything: he already thinks you’re bad enough, there’s no reason to add fuel to the fire. You can’t tell your boyfriend that you hate his friend, because then you actually do look like the bad guy.
How to handle it? Kill him with kindness. Buy their apartment a 30 one night, send pizza over for Sunday night football, whatever – just show his other friends that you’re not so bad at all and you’re actually pretty cool to be with. Let the friend have his doubts about you and move on.You’re not dating him, and if you’re still dating your boyfriend after this kid tries to interfere then you can be rest assured that your boyfriend doesn’t care much about what his friend thinks after all when it comes to your guys relationship.
Scenario Two: Rude Guy
This is his friend that basically doesn’t acknowledge your existence. You’ve known him for a few years now and he still hasn’t warmed up to you. It almost seems as if he’s trying to make your life harder. You try to wave, try to be nice, and he just blocks you out. It’s hard to say if he just doesn’t like you, doesn’t care to be friendly to his buddy’s girl, or if is just a lost cause all together.
How to Fix It:
As much as it’s going to suck dating someone with a friend like this, you just have to brush your hands off and move on. Still be nice and courteous when you see him, but don’t make it your job to win him over. Make yourself feel better by remembering that obviously your boyfriend sees something in this guy so he can’t be completely awful, even though he may seem that way to you. Sure it would be nice if your boyfriend’s friends all liked you, but why waste your time trying to win over one of them who obviously isn’t the best person to be close with.
Don’t expect too much from anyone. Even though you’re mature and friendly doesn’t mean his friends are going to be. Be yourself, throw in a little extra effort here and there, and then if they still don’t like you it’s safe to say it’s not your fault. If your boyfriend is still with you despite this bad friend of his, then you both can rest assured that this kid doesn’t matter now, and he never will.
Of course you want his friends to like you, but you don’t need to and shouldn’t have to kill yourself trying to win them over. It’s only fair that they put in just as much effort as you are. When it comes to bad boyfriend friends, try to keep your cool before you wipe them clean from your hands and move forward.
Category: Dating / Sex